Mom, depressed?

Thru years my son watched me having times of depression but thanks to him I could resist them. When he was 4 years old he haven´t noticed it was for me very difficult to go to birthdays and factory celebrations. My mom, was my angel, she joined me.

I always alloud him to use the same custome: Power Ranger. First he loved the red, after he wanted the blue and in this beginings I never got late for him. When he was at highschool just once and because of traffic.

Saturdays as I share, were our days and the best part was when we got home and I placed all his toys Beto, Simon (a bear), the blue turtle and so on in the small living room we had because it was rare to have visits that not correspond with family. Well, I placed the toys and the show began.

I put the tape recorder in a happy station an said: Ladies and Gentleman, from russian circus today we have with us… and I said his name and he felt huge and I started making the rare audience to talk.

— Is wonderful, Beto said.

— No, is more than that, look his magic…

And I was tired but those hours I was happy.

His father support was very small but I used to buy him something telling it was for him, and I paid half ot the salary of Pauli, a beautiful and sweet woman who allound me to work out of home.

He came three times to Colombia in 18 years and he share with Tomas last year a week in Hamburg because our son was studying in Bremen and it was like europeans said: convenient.

In 17 years, his father sent me only one picture and of his grandson.

I was a single mom with depression in her life and I have to deal it the only way I know: with discipline.

I wil never forgot whe my ex, who he calls dad, took him to visit me during a hospitalization. I couldn´t forgot that image of him saying hello and by trough a fence.

Fortunately, he doesn´t remember that. The toy´s show was and is the favorite memorie.