When my image doesn´t belong to me

During depression we avoid mirrors because the image reflected doesn´t look like we think we are or we were. Men stop shaving. Women forgot to wash their hair. No one uses toothbrush or deodorant, what is perfum for?

The image in the mirror reflect your sadness and also is a thermometer of your will of live.

Is truth that you hate yourself. You can´t feel good for nothing. You forgot basic things like preparing coffee (how many spoons, do I use sugar) and you also start feeling contempt for meals. You are lazy to change clothes and you want the curtains down to avoid light. Darkness is your ally.

Your family tries to motivate you inviting you to the cinema and probably your mom makes your favorite food to lift your spirit but you do not want to talk less to eat. You don´t want to respond any question. Why is so difficult for them to understand that you want to be alone?

That image bully you. You feel ugly, unwanted and deeply alone surrounded by the phantoms of a small imagination that can not read and that hurts too much to be expressed by words.

The TV is on. But you are not available to follow what they are they talking about. The balcony looks very atractive for your intentions of stop suffering. But you can´t jump, it will be an unfair decision with the people who loves or loved you.

Shower? it means passing close to the mirror. And again, that person is not you. Who kidnaped your soul?

What are you doing to change this horrible cycle of hopelessness? Are you taking your medicine? Please, do not answer no. Synthoms will get worst.